Baths, and PJ's, and just because I can

I realized a few days ago that we've never taken a picture of all 3 kids in the bathtub together. A daily occurrence around here, and one that I admittedly sometimes face with dread after a long day, and a day when the daddy Calvary wont be coming home until after the bedtime routine is finished. But these are the moments- chaotic and tiresome and seemingly endless now- that I will one day look back on with longing. There's just something about deliciously smelling, clean kids in their jammies that makes it nearly impossible not to snuggle them. So here is our last month of PJs, robes, and birthday suits.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care

Getting into the Christmas spirit this year has been so easy for me. In years past, those years that were pre-having kids, yet post feeling like a kid myself, I had begun to view Christmas as just an unnecessary amount of stress and over-indulgence. I stressed about dragging out all the decorations only to shove them back in their bins a month later. I stressed about fighting the crowds at the mall and trying to find the perfect gifts for the people that are always impossible to shop for. I stressed about how consumerism and greed clouded the story of Jesus' birth and how the quiet wonderment of the manger was drowned out in the hustle-bustle of rushing from one activity to the next unendingly. I guess I had become somewhat of a scrooge in many ways. I was going through the motions with a smile on my face but deep down it all seemed really quite pointless.

And then I had kids. And like so many things tend to do when you're a parent, my whole view of Christmas has changed. And I'm sure a lot of it is the age that Eli is this year being 2, almost 3 years old, and having Norah as well now. Suddenly, the magic of the holiday is back. Suddenly I can't wait to get the tree put up and hang the garland and fire up the Christmas music. Watching Eli as he runs downstairs to turn on the tree lights and shrieks with joy when he realizes that a stocking has his name on it and sitting on Santa's lap for the first time, and shouting as he points out all the "Christmas" houses lit up at night in the neighborhood, and belting out Go Tell It On The Mountain from the backseat is so refreshing. Listening to him tell us about Mary and Joseph and Jesus' birth on the way home from church each Sunday is precious. Knowing that he is at the beginning ages of being able to implement special family traditions that he will begin to look forward  to and depend on each coming year is exciting to me. Hearing his answers to Santa and others who have asked him "What do you want for Christmas" makes me want to cling to his innocence and bottle him up when he replies with things like "snow" and "snowmen" and "snow globes" He is too young to be caught up in the "gimmies" of Christmas, and yet perfectly old enough to take in all the wonder of the season.  I know this is a short phase and I'm sure in a couple quick years my children will be handing me long lists of the "I wants" for Christmas. So this year, I am trying not to miss a single moment. I have come to realize that it is completely possible and perfectly OK to be taken in by the magic and beauty of Christmas, while still keeping our focus on the real reason that we celebrate this season. It is about the baby that was born into poverty, that grew up to die a death He did not deserve, to save us from a debt we could not afford to pay. That is the gift that I am most thankful for this year.

Sideline Support

Papa Bob, Papa Gramps, and Daddy's faithful cheerleaders as they work on the deck in the sweltering heat.

The Dilema of Discipline

So I just finished reading a book called Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp. This book, written by a pastor and counselor, is for parents looking for a biblically based method of training and disciplining your children in a way that points them to Jesus. He focuses on getting straight to your children's' hearts and teaching them to obey and respect you, which in turn teaches them to obey and respect God.

I have been really struggling with how to discipline Eli effectively, yet without yelling or losing my mind. I don't want him to only obey me because he fears me (although there should be a healthy level fear and respect), but rather I want him to obey me because he knows this is pleasing to the Lord. And WOW, it has been really hard. I wouldn't say patience is one of my strong points either, so it is a daily battle to keep my temper in check. I found so much freedom in the following passage of this book....

"If you allow unholy anger to muddy the correction process, you are wrong. You need to ask for forgiveness. Your right to discipline your child is tied to what God has called you to do, not to your own agenda. Unholy anger-anger over the fact that you are not getting what you want from your child-will muddy the waters of discipline. Anger that your child is not doing what you want frames discipline as a problem between parent and child, not as a problem between the child and God. It is God who is not being obeyed when you are disobeyed. It is God who is not being honored when you are not honored. The issue is not an interpersonal contest, it is rather your insistence that your child obey God, because obeying God is good and right."

That just hit me right in the face. I can't take Eli's disobedience personally! He was born a sinner in need of a Savior, just as we all were. How can I expect him to act holy and have a heart for others on his own? It is my duty and great responsibility to teach him what the heart of Jesus is, in the hopes that he will realize his grave need of a Savior as he understands that he cannot do good things without him.

I will say that his book may be a bit controversial for some parents because it is very pro-spanking. He even goes so far to say that if you are not spanking your child (in a loving, Godly manner or course) than you are not being obedient to what God has said. I have been on the fence about spanking, but after reading this, tend to agree that it is a very biblical way to discipline. You may feel otherwise, and that is OK.

I have a renewed sense of confidence in my role as the one God has entrusted to raise his children. There is no greater calling than to raise a warrior for the Kingdom of God.

Mowing with Daddy

A humbling reminder that as parents, we are called to be imitators of Christ.....because chances are, someone else is imitating us.

"Be imitators of God, therefore as dearly loved childen, and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God."

-Ephesians 5:1,2-